FiNaL◎峰

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原帖由 紙包蒸餾水 於 2012-1-31 21:57 發表
順面講一講我係想做市場策劃(吾知英文名係咩=.=),投資顧問等等從商既工作  

Marketing Director?,
Investment Adviser?

FiNaL◎峰

引用:

原帖由 kaka123 於 2012-1-31 23:09 發表

In the community (What community?or sociality?), I want to server in marketing and investment market, it because I am very interest in economiccategory(感覺好怪, 我會改寫, I was deeply interested in economic and business world when I was young, then till now I think I could aspire my dream) .In secondary school, I was always join some activites to be related to economics.(I always participated in any economic activities meanwhile I felt really enjoyable. So, I would drum up all the chances to let me ... ) Except to interflow with classmades in economics, I had be(have used) volunteer in a charity bazaar, I need to make use of my knowledge of economics (I hope I could utilize my knowledge in economics to ... ) that I can sell our(那來的our? 不懂, 什麼product?) product more easy(more easily) , like how to popularize, which product to be well liked, etc.That is the main reason of choose to get into university, (如果呢封信係交比學校,我諗你要寫間學校有咩特點可以幫助你實淺你既自願) I can learn knowledge in depth to help me practice my aspiration. <這句不懂改了, 就算translate返做中文, 我可以學習更深奧知識來幫助我準備我既抱負, )

我英文都唔是好好, 所以我都唔係好識改你既表達方式
同埋交一段野搞惦架啦=.=?... 我個frd今年係toronto都報 econ, UT仲有好多間, 都寫左好多篇咁既野
如果想我幫手問佢借黎比你做參考既 就$ 你懂的

[ 本帖最後由 FiNaL◎峰 於 2012-2-1 06:13 編輯 ]

FiNaL◎峰

篇野好虛泛...  main idea太少, 其實作文寫上去grammar唔係咁重要, 最緊要內容夠精彩, 表達到你既意思, 當然最basic既grammar錯左都幾係野)~

FiNaL◎峰

引用:

原帖由 kaka123 於 2012-2-1 23:43 發表
(你果篇咩野黎?入學信?) Greetings, I am xxx. I have grown strong interest in economic field during my six years school life. Also, I am creative and love to show it to others. Therefore, I would love to participate in marketing and advertising design in the future which can show my creativity.

I think my experience gained from my school life could help me achieve my objectives. Besides communicate with classmates, I am a helper in many charity functions held by my school, where I use my marking(SM) knowledge to help customer choosing the best products. Those experience(s) are valuable have me to proceed forward.

On the other hand(in addition好d, OTOH咁用好怪-_-), I joined the green fashion show as a designer and model by using some different reusable waste, I won the competition and gain confidence in my designing skills, this will help me down the road.

I truly believe the (邊個professor?...) professor can(could) help my academic and give me views and advice of my future, my problem solving skills, etc... And with the strong and free learning atmosphere, I could maximize my creativity and knowledge and(兩者唔關連) get the most of the professional facilitates. I hope I could get the fair chance to the opportunities(chance同opp係同一樣野黎..., 自己google search下個句子係唔係有問題) for me to achieve my goals.  

岩岩改完佢話我唔夠15字, 返回上一頁=.='' 呃下字數字數字數字數字數字數字數

FiNaL◎峰

引用:

原帖由 No0B 於 2012-2-1 23:12 發表
喇..姐係咁
小弟本身英文就極差
有錯請指正
旨在練習架姐


你好,我叫xxx.在六年的校園生活中,我在經濟科培養了濃厚的興趣,而我亦
Hello,I am xxx.I've studied in this for six year and I developed an interest i ...

GOOGLE TRANSLATE 成篇野? 垃圾黎~ ...